It’s a plane!

It’s the guy who probably brushed Blago’s long and luxurious hair to get the job!

It’s Super Schmuck!

So, the guy who can’t tell the truth about how he got his job, apparently, can’t tell the truth about anything else.

From Here:

Earlier today, a United flight to Chicago carrying White House Social Secretary Desiree Rogers and a bunch of Chicago Machine Politicians was forced to make an emergency landing in Pittsburgh after the flight experienced a malfunction of “on-air equipment.” Sen. Roland Burris was on this flight apparently, and, according to his spokesman, got up to some heroics. Here’s what Lynn Sweet was told:

Jim O’Connor, a Burris spokesman, said Burris told him that he heard a loud bang at take-off, sometime near 11:30 a.m. One the plane was in the air, the noises became deafening and the plane began to shake, O’Connor said. There was also a great deal of turbulence.The pilot announced to the passengers there was a hydrolic system failure and the O’Hare Airport-bound plane would be making an emergency landing in Pittsburgh.

Emergency vehicles met the plane on the tarmac upon landing. Burris helped an elderly woman off the plane.

 

Sounds impressive! But, before Burris runs off to scrawl “SUPER AEROPLANE HERO” on his “Mausoleum of Accomplishments,” he’d better get shot of the accusations of another passenger, who says, via Twitter, that Burris is not telling the truth:

Obviously, we can’t corroborate any of this! But here’s a taste of your newspaperless future, where everyone on Twitter is either KEEPING THEM HONEST 140 characters at a time, or, you know…sending sexts to each other, like always.

Back to me.

Yay for Twitter!

This is the kind of thing the media would eat up – showboating loser politician saves elderly lady from a plane!  He’s a hero!  let’s not focus on the fact that he’s duplicitous, untrustworthy and should be dealing with a recall election?

(Come on, Illinois… GET ON THE STICK!)

Luckily one person had twitter and busted him.  And for that, I say… Huzzah!  Let’s give a big old shout Http://twitter.com/carolblymire!

She’s my hero!

From Huffpo:
Joe the Plumber, aka Samuel Wurzelbacher, sat down for an lengthy interview with Christianity Today to discuss his views on the future of the Republican party. Wurzelbacher took the opportunity to speak out against gay marriage, which he says is wrong. The unlikely conservative spokesman went so far as to say he doesn’t allow openly gay people “anywhere near” his children.

The word “queer,” Wurzelbacher noted, “means strange and unusual.”

Christianity Today: In the last month, same-sex marriage has become legal in Iowa and Vermont. What do you think about same-sex marriage at a state level?
Wurzelbacher: At a state level, it’s up to them. I don’t want it to be a federal thing. I personally still think it’s wrong. People don’t understand the dictionary–it’s called queer. Queer means strange and unusual. It’s not like a slur, like you would call a white person a honky or something like that. You know, God is pretty explicit in what we’re supposed to do–what man and woman are for. Now, at the same time, we’re supposed to love everybody and accept people, and preach against the sins. I’ve had some friends that are actually homosexual. And, I mean, they know where I stand, and they know that I wouldn’t have them anywhere near my children. But at the same time, they’re people, and they’re going to do their thing.

I don’t even know where to start.  The comedian in me wants to rip him apart because of the “calling a white guy a honkey” thing – like somehow that’s the most horrific thing ever in the history of insults.

But I can’t.

I’m roiling with an interesting combination of pity and fury.

Fury, because it’s ridiculous enough this assmunch had fifteen minutes of – I don’t want to call it fame as much as I want to call it footsie.  For fifteen minutes, the american public played footsie with this guy, thinking he was “one of the regular guys.”

And then he talks, and you realize exactly what kind of guy he is.

Thank you for your definition of “queer,” but it’s a five-letter word and I’m guessing if you know it, I know it.  Here’s a few more for you.  Intolerant.  Prejudiced.  Xenophobic.   If you’re scratching you’re bald, dumb head, zip on over to dictionary.com.

You have gay friends but you won’t let your kids near them?  Then:

a) You have a completely screwed up idea what a friend is and

b) I’m sure they don’t want to be anywhere near your kid.

Because God forbid that child have an independent thought, or want to do something with their life besides crush a beer can on their head, you’re going to accuse your “friend” of  trying to convert him.

Guys like this have an attitude – I’ve seen it, heard it  - that because you live on the west coast your morals get chipped away, or somehow you become “inured” to certain lifestyles.  As though I skipped my way here from the midwest holding a picnic basket, and all the forces of “evil and decay” (not my words, metaphors) finally chipped away at my stalwart midwestern upbringing.

That’s one way to look at it.  If you got dropped on your head as a child.

The other way is that when you leave your bubble, your comfort zone, you start to see people as people… not labels.  It doesn’t mean you don’t laugh at a joke, or roll your eyes at the more outlandish behavior – I’ll equate certain floats at a certain parade with certain St. Patrick’s Day stupidity on a 1-to-1 level.

Flamboyance makes some people roll their eyes.  Fair enough.  There are beer ads make me embarrassed to be straight and enjoy football.

I probably didn’t know many homosexuals, growing up in suburban Chicago.  I probably knew a few going to college, but was too busy enjoying my new romance with beer to care.  I’m sure I worked with a few when I first started in Hollywood.  And as I got older, calmer and started to pay more attention to life around me – I started to realize I had a lot more gay friends than I thought.

Friends. People i choose to be around because they’re good people.  As opposed to this guy, who chooses not to be around people because of who they are.

So, there’s fury.  Because this guy is a douche. This guy should have been done a long time ago. This guy is an embarrassment to middle-aged caucasians from the midwest.

But then, there’s pity.  Because he will NEVER know any better.  He will NEVER learn from anyone different, grow to be a bigger person… he is trapped in the small, suffocating hamster ball of his own making, doomed to roll around in whatever life he’s making for himself.  But that’s the end of the pity, because this guy sucks.

I wouldn’t let my kids near him – not because he looks like the bald guy I saw on a poster who isn’t allowed within 500 feet of a school – but because I think he’s a bully, a jerk, and a bad influence.  And – not unlike Swine Flu – I would take the proper precautions as I’d be afraid that this guy’s stupid is contagious.

Because we know who he is now.

He’s not a “regular Joe.”  He’s that jerk who cuts you off, flips you the bird and screams at you, even though you did nothing wrong.  The guy who’s got so much emotional baggage that he’ll bump into you in the grocery story and then push you into the soup saying “Watch where you’re going.”

He’s the guy telling you to go back to Mexico.  Or cut your hair.  Or “Love it or leave it.”

He’s an a**hole.