But first, I will say:  If you’re not reading “Fear Itself,” turn in your Nerd Badge.

It’s a lot of comic books.  Here’s what I think so far:

MUSTS:

Justice League - Great.  First look at the new Superman costume, and I like it.  It also features the return of the Grant Morrison level “Super-Bat,” but he’s not as much of a broody douche.  This book is a keeper.

Batgirl - I had my doubts.  But I liked it.   I like Barbara Gordon back in the suit, and I don’t mind the retrofit that made it happen.  I’ll be back.

Action Comics - SO GOOD!  Not just a great book, but it pissed off a narrow minded inbred.   One of the books that made me bummed when it was over, as I wanted more.  This is a good thing.

Detective Comics - A little too much “Look at the new Batsuit!” (Seriously, three pages of package shots) but still, a good read.  I’ll be back.   

Animal Man - Surprise hit for me.  I loved Morrison’s “Animal Man” run - it, and his run on Justice League - are the whole reason I have a comic app on my iPad.  This book feels just as good.  If you aren’t reading it, get it now.

OMAC - Wanted to hate it.  Didn’t.  You get another $3 from me next month.

Swamp Thing - Yes.  That simple.

Green Lantern - I don’t care that the book hasn’t changed and is EXACTLY where it ended before the reboot.  I liked the book.  Keeper.

Deathstroke - Surprisingly enjoyable!  Reviews getting smaller because I’m getting tired.  But I’ll be back.  If they can skirt the line between keeping him a villain and still enjoying the book, that’s skill.

Batman and Robin - It’s no small feat to follow Morrison (yeah, I know, I’m predictable).  But I like this book a lot.  I like that it half-acknowledged the continuity change, but honors what was done before.  Not sure if I like the villain, but I like the Father/Son dynamic going on here.  Keeper.

WILL BE BACK FOR, JUST NOT AS PASSIONATELY:

Stormwatch - This one ALMOST fell into the “On The Bubble” category, because I’m a little baffled that Apollo and Midnighter exist in the same universe as Superman and Batman.   The Projectionist character is a bit annoying.  But the “bigness” of the villain (no spoilers) made me both like and miss the original book.  I’m in through the first arc.

Static Shock - The wisecracks could be a little wisecracker and a villain named “Virule?” (Along with creepy font to let you know… he’s creepy)  I dunno.  Still, I love the character.  You get me for an arc.

SuperBoy - Good God that’s a lot of retrofitting to make it work with the Young Justice cartoon.  But… Again, I like the character.  Might survive, might just be something I read until he ends up in the team book.

ON THE BUBBLE

Batwing - I dunno.  I want to like this book, but… I like the character more in Batman Incorporated than I do here.  I’ll give it a couple more but, I’m iffy here.

Justice League International - Dammit.  Wanted to like this but… it’s not funny like the old book, it’s not serious enough to not look like the less fun step-brother of the actual Justice League book… and I hate, hate, hate Booster Gold’s new costume.  It’s like he mugged Jeff Gordon and took his nascar suit.

I’ll give this one more buy out of nostalgia for the ’90s, but… I do not have high hopes.

Red Lanterns - I like the angry cat.  I like the guy who likes the angry cat.  But that’s not enough of a hook to keep me around.  

Resurrection Man - How did this guy get one of the 52?  Did they need two books that started with “R?”  The writing was crisp but the concept not so much.  I smell a drop off.

Suicide Squad - Doubtful.  First, they gothed up and tarted up Harley Quinn:

Then they leaned down Amanda Waller.

Might need to boycott this just on the misogyny alone.  And that’s me saying that.

PROBABLY NOT

Grifter - Not sure what happened, don’t know what’s going on, $3 is half a shot of absolute vodka.  Gonna need some convincing on this one, kids.

Demon Knights - Sorry.

Frankenstein - Sorry.

Mister Terrific - Good on a team, not enough to keep me around.  And honestly, a little too much of the race card being played in the book.  The line where he asks for a simple “Thanks, Black Guy, for saving us from a homicidal lunatic” combined with the cat fight between girls of different color over his attention…  Very heavy handed, IMHO.

Legion Lost - I want to like this book, but it’s a lot of noise, not a lot of story.  Just reset the 31st century and give me flight rings and lets call it a reboot, okay?

Hawk & Dove - Gotta go.

Green Arrow - So, basically, he’s Batman with arrows?  I like my Batmans with Bats thank you.  Moving on.

DIDN’T GET

Men of War

Batwoman

- - -

From My friend Heidi’s “The Beat:”

A Comic Conspiracy is a store in Asheboro, North Carolina, and evidently the owner is a staunch Christian. So staunch that even the letters “gd” in a sound effect balloon coming from Superman’s mouth has so offended his values that he has canceled all his orders for ACTION #2 and #3. He announced his intentions on his store’s Facebook page, and as people have heard about his plan, outcry has…grown.

This is from the same Grant Morrison that had an Angel, who fought with the Justice League, say “Jesus Christ!” because he felt that’s what the character would say.

If you live in the same town as this small-minded bonehead, I highly recommend you buy your #2 and #3 from http://www.bravenewworldcomics.com/ in Valencia, California.

Not only will they respect you for your faith, they won’t judge you for the lack of an “o.”

Ridiculous.

- - - - 

Apparently this guy already folded like a Chic-Fil-A in Dallas on Superbowl Sunday.

Enjoy the whole collapse at his store’s Facebook page because it’s a treat.

I respect his faith.  I laugh at his ignorance.

Usually, I will repost something with links, or credit, or whatever.  But I so dislike this article I have no desire to help you help her hit count.  

To be clear, it is a Gizmodo writer who wrote this - used a dating service to go out with somebody and then bashed him in her blog because he happened to have a hobby she deemed “unworthy of her.”  

Her words are in italics.  

My response… that’s in regular font.

If you want to, google it and head over to her article and find it.  Otherwise, read it here and feel free to seethe with me.

Here’s the piece:

My Brief OkCupid Affair With a World ChampionMagic: The GatheringPlayer

This story sounds mean. It’s about a girl judging a boy because he’s a nerd (like so many of us!) that she met on OkCupid. But that’s the point: Judging people on shallow stuff is human nature, and the magic and absurdity of online dating is how immediately and directly it throws that into relief. One person’s Magic is another person’s fingernail biting, and no profile in the world is deep enough to account for that.

Earlier this month, I came home drunk and made an OKCupid profile. What the hell, I thought. I’m busy, I’m single, andeverybody’s doing it. Sure, I’d heard some stories, but what was the worst that could happen?

Two weeks into my online dating experiment, OKCupid had broken me down. It was like the online equivalent to hanging out alone in a dark, date-rapey bar. Every time I signed on, I was hit by a barrage of creepy messages. “Dem gurl u so foine, iwud lik veru much for me nd u to be marry n procreate.” Or “your legs do look strong.” So when I saw an IM from a guy named Jon that said, “You should go out with me :)” I was relieved. He seemed normal. I gave him my name. “Google away,” I said. Then dinner was ready, and I signed off without remembering to do the same.

We met for a drink later that week. Jon was thin and tall, dressed in a hedge fund uniform with pale skin and pierced ears. We started talking about normal stuff—family, work, college. I told him my brother was a gamer. And then he casually mentioned that he played Magic: The Gathering when he was younger.

“Actually,” he paused. “I’m the world champion.”

I laughed. Oh that’s a funny joke! I thought. This guy is funny! But the earnest look on his face told me he wasn’t kidding.

I gulped my beer and thought about Magic, that strategic collectible card game involving wizards and spells and other detailed geekery. A long-forgotten fad, like pogs or something. But before I could dig deeper, we had to go. Jon had bought us tickets for a one-man show based on serial killer Jeffrey Dahmer’s life story. It was not a particularly romantic evening.

The next day I Googled my date and a wealth of information flowed into my browser. A Wikipedia page! Competition videos! Fanboy forums comparing him to Chuck Norris! This guy isn’t just some professional who dabbled in card games at a tender age. He’s Jonm********ing Finkel, the man who is so widely revered in the game of Magic that he’s been immortalized in his own playing card.

Just like you’re obligated to mention you’re divorced or have a kid in your online profile, shouldn’t someone also be required to disclose any indisputably geeky world championship titles? But maybe it was a long time ago? We met for round two later that week.

At dinner I got straight down to it. Did he still play? “Yes.” Strike one. How often? “I’m preparing for a tournament this weekend.” Strike two. Who did he hang out with? “I’ve met all my best friends through Magic.” Strike three. I smiled and nodded and listened. Eventually I even felt a little bit bad that I didn’t know shit about the game. Here was a guy who had dedicated a good chunk of his life to mastering Magic, on a date with a girl who can barely play Solitaire. This is what happens, I thought, when you leave things out of your online profile.

I later found out that Jon infiltrated his way into OKCupid dates with at least two other people I sort of know, including one of my co-workers. Mothers, warn your daughters! This could happen to you. You’ll think you’ve found a normal bearded guy with a job, only to end up sharing goat cheese with a guy who takes you to a one-man show based on Jeffrey Dahmer’s life story.

Maybe I’m an OKCupid a*****e for calling it that way. Maybe I’m shallow for not being able to see past Jon’s world title. I’ll own that. But there’s a larger point here: that judging people on shallow stuff is human nature; one person’s Magic is another person’s fingernail biting, or sports obsession, or verbal tic. No online dating profile in the world is comprehensive enough to highlight every person’s peccadillo, or anticipate the inane biases that each of us lugs around. There’s no snapshot in the world that can account for our snap judgments.

So what did I learn? Google the shit out of your next online date. Like, hardcore.

Dear, you.

First:  Yes, you are a jerk for judging somebody for their hobby.  Had this been an article about how you didn’t want to see him again because he chose to bring you to a one-person show based on the life of Jeffrey Dahmer, chances are the whole world would have gone “Um, duh.”

However, here’s you, openly mocking somebody who is the best in the world at something.  Let me repeat that, because it’s important:

THE BEST IN THE WORLD AT SOMETHING.

Are you the best at the world at anything?  I’m not.  There are things I’m good at, things I hope I’m great at, things I hope I can be better at… but best in the world?  No.

The writer of this piece is so vapid - so sure the stuff she’s nerdy about makes her cooler than the stuff this other person is nerdy about -  that it’s okay to piss all over an ACTUAL PERSON who made the mistake of being kind to her via an online dating site.

She thinks he needed to disclose that he was still into “Magic The Gathering?”  Maybe she should have disclosed the fact that if she didn’t like the date, she’d write about it on a popular tech site like some kind of discount, dot-com-Carrie-Bradshaw-Wanna-be.

So, just to be clear… I’d like to dissect the mea culpa:

This story sounds mean.

No.  It is mean.  

It’s about a girl judging a boy because he’s a nerd (like so many of us!) that she met on OkCupid.

You don’t get to use the word “Nerd” anymore.  You aren’t a nerd.  You’re one of the people that openly mock and humiliate nerds because they are who they are.  You’re not a nerd.  You’re not a geek.  You’re the villain in every John Hughes movie.

But that’s the point: Judging people on shallow stuff is human nature,

No, it’s a choice.  

and the magic and absurdity of online dating is how immediately and directly it throws that into relief.

I don’t even know what this sentence means.  Is it code?

One person’s Magic is another person’s fingernail biting, and no profile in the world is deep enough to account for that.

Of that, we are in agreement.

For example, one person’s tech site is another person’s place to be petty.  

I don’t know this Magic The Gathering guy. I have never played the game.

However, I can probably recite every story from every comic book I have ever read since I was eight.   Tomorrow, after work, I will be at the comic store by where I live getting the very first edition of the reboot of “Justice League.”  And I will do it proudly.

Meanwhile, you’re saying you could use a deeper profile?

Maybe what you need is to be is a deeper person.