Marmel.com

“Metaphorically, son!  That’s a metaphor I say!”

Wealthy GOP super PAC donor Foster Friess, fresh off announcing a conversion from Rick Santorum’s corner to Mitt Romney’s, drew a little unwanted attention Wednesday when he used gun imagery to weigh in on the shifting state of the 2012 race.

“There are a lot of things that haven’t been hammered at because Rick and Mitt have been going at each other,” Friess said during an interview on Fox Business News. “Now that they have trained their barrels on President Obama, I hope his teleprompters are bulletproof.”

He quickly went on to admit that he “probably shouldn’t have said that.”

It’s not the first time Friess has created controversy during a media appearance.

In February, then a top surrogate for Santorum, Friess spoke with MSNBC’s Andrea Mitchell about what he described as the triviality of the contraception debate.

“This contraceptive thing, my gosh it’s such [sic] inexpensive. Back in my days, they used Bayer Aspirin for contraception. The gals put it between their knees and it wasn’t that costly,” he said.

He later apologized for the failed “joke.”

Yes, because now is the perfect time to be cracking wise about training a gun on a black guy.  Well timed, Foster.  Nicely done, Foghorn Asshorn.

So why is the media still interviewing this country fried fool?  Because he’s rich?  Because his name sounds like an ice cream chain?  Or because every time he flaps his gums, it’s a reminder of the old school, mint julep sippin’, dick on a porch mentality that the GOP loves.

You backed the wrong horsesh*t.  Now that Santorum is returning to the dining room table in crazy town, it’s time for you to go away.

That’s all folks.

It’s coming, folks.

Seriously.  

If he fails to best Mitt Romneyin the race for the party nomination, Rick Santorum would be open to serving as vice president, the former Pennsylvania senator told the Christian Broadcast Network on Monday.

Here’s a partial transcript of the interview with CBN’s David Brody, which will air later this week:

Brody: If he for some reason asks you to be the vice presidential candidate on his ticket? I know, after is all said and done. Would you even consider it?

Santorum: Of course. I mean, look. I would do in this race as I always say, this is the most important race in our country’s history. I’m going to do everything I can. I’m doing everything I can. I’m out there. In the last 10 months, I’ve had five days off. Two for Thanksgiving, and three for Christmas.

I’ve been working every single day. My wife and my kids, we’re just busting our tail, because we know their future and all of our children’s future is at stake in this election. And I don’t want to be the guy who has to sit with my granddaughter, 20 years from now, and tell stories about an America where people once were free. I don’t want to have that conversation.

Brody: So, you’re keeping your options open.

Santorum: I’ll do whatever is necessary to help our country.

Yeah, after your last few classless days, I’m sure Mitt’s gonna welcome you with open arms.

Between this and raving on the steps of the Supreme Court today, I’m wondering if you should be taken in for observation.

Help our country?  I’m terrified you’re going to harm yourself.  Note to his family: Please keep the sharp things away from Rick.

Lunatic.

Now Rick Santorum has something to say about Obama having something to say about Trayvon Martin: 

“Santorum said on Friday that the president should “not use these types of horrible and tragic individual cases to try to drive a wedge in America.””

What is driving a wedge in America are things like George Zimmerman shooting an unarmed Trayvon Martin and the police in Florida still not taking him in for questioning.

What should be helping the country deal with it, are things like the President helping to put things in focus.  

What’s making it worse are asshole candidates using it to pander to a base. The one that doesn’t like the black guy talking.  The one that’s indifferent to a black kid getting shot.  

Which reminds me: Congratulations, Santorum, on your resounding win in the GOP primary in Louisiana.  

You’re despicable, both of you.

Quite possibly the greatest political parody video ever made in the history of man.

For more on the cartoon, the censorship and the absolute horror of it, click on over to:

http://www.addictinginfo.org/2012/03/12/the-doonesbury-comic-strip-republicans-dont-want-you-to-see/

Als

Also, as always, join me at: Http://facebook.com/themarmelpage

Wow.  Is this guy ever an imbecile.  But, lets get right to the deets.

Thank you CrooksAndLiars.com.

He cares, ladies.  It kills him, deep inside, down where he hates gays and wants you back in the kitchen, that you have any kind of control over your bodies. 

You know what?  I use to find this guy funny, but in a “Ha ha, wow, somebody on the right is going to point out what a tool he is” funny.

But since that’s clearly not going to happen, I have a different attitude about it now.  Now, I just want this guy relegated to the used condom pile of history.

I want to see him start to lose the woman vote to send a message to him, the other candidates, and every moron still living in the 1950s.

Limbaugh learned his lesson this week:  Actions have consequences.  (Sort of.  His apology was a steaming piece of PR crap, but he still had to choke down “I’m Sorry” which I only appreciate because I know he hated it)

But as long as this Santorum turd is being funded by billionaire like minded turds like Foster Friess- thank you Super Pacs - he still gets airtime.  He’s still in the game.

So, as of today, I pick Mormon over Moron…

…because if - IF - Obama loses, I would rather have Romney in there instead of this Evangelistic Ayatollah. 

And once Santorum is out of the picture and as irrelevant as he deserves to be, I will happily start fighting the fight against whatever Romney we get after Romney secures the nomination.   

But honestly, it’s time to abort the idea of a Santorum Presidency.  Make it happen, Super Tuesday.  Make it happen, women voters.

Another day, another panderous, idiotic position.  He’s the Gumby of ignorance, no matter which way you twist him… something stupid is going to come out.

Making the rounds of the Sunday news shows, Rick Santorum reaffirmed his criticism of President Barack Obama as “a snob” for supporting a platform of universal higher education.

 The former Pennsylvania senator argued that Obama’s encouragement of students to go to college ignored both the reality and ambitions of those who wanted to pursue more technical careers. In an interview with NBC’s “Meet the Press,” he sounded a more conspiratorial note. Two days after calling colleges “indoctrination mills,”Santorum suggested that the president’s encouragement of college degrees was a back-door effort at philosophical base building.

 “Barack Obama is a person of the left,” he said. “He is someone who believes in big government. He believes in the values that are, unfortunately, the dominant values, and political values, and overly politicized values, and politically correct values that are on most college and university campuses.”

 The appearances by the on-again off-again GOP frontrunner laid to rest any question as to whether he would back down from his criticism of Obama’s education policy (he clearly isn’t). But they also did very little to clarify the source of Santorum’s objection.

 It’s unclear whether Obama ever said that every child in American “should” go to college. Nor is it evident that he has said he “wants everybody in America to go to college,” as Santorum claims he has. The president did say in a recent speech that “every child deserves a great school.” He also has said that “higher education can’t be a luxury — it is an economic imperative that every family in America should be able to afford.” In August 2010, the president pledged to ”make sure we’ve got a world-class education system for everybody.”

You’ve heard of “No Child Left Behind?”  This is “No Child Left A Chance.”

Santorum’s inferring that the President doesn’t appreciate what “regular Americans” can do.  That by suggesting they should all have access to a higher-education, he’s somehow saying that “people who work with their hands” are somehow less important.

You know, people that do gritty, down to earth, regular person manual stuff.  Like lawyer and Senator Rick Santorum does… n’t.

I am dying to watch this clown debate Obama, but we know he’s not going to get this far.  So let’s just pick apart his weak argument, shall we?

College isn’t about just an education.  It’s about helping a kid find out what their opportunities are - to shine a light on their talents, inspire them to figure out who they want to be when they become adults.

It’s letting them know  there are more roads to travel than the one that leads in and out of whatever town, suburb, city or life they happen to have been born into.

I went to the University of Wisconsin - Madison to get a degree in journalism.  In the process, I learned I wanted to do stand-up comedy, which brought me to writing, which brought me to writing for television.  

That didn’t happen randomly - it happened because when I decided to be a writer (I understand that’s debatable if you know my work) I met people who knew how to turn that into a career. They gave me skills I still use today. More importantly, they gave me knowledgeable encouragement and the confidence that I could succeed.  

And in every career, for every young adult, there’s a path like that, that can be found through a college, a community college, or some place of higher learning.  

It’s also a place where a young adult can try, and fail, to figure out who they want to be.  Journalism not working out for you?  Switch to Law.  Law sucks?  Move to engineering.  Not a good engineer?  Learn to fix puppies.  Whatever.

Or maybe decide “You know what?  I want to be the best auto-mechanic in the rural Pennsylvania area.”  And that’s fine.  

But if that person had the potential to cure a disease or create the next Apple, it’s a crime he or she wasn’t exposed to the skills, tools and people who could offer that as an option.

Just like it Rick Santorum:

 He obtained an undergraduate degree from Pennsylvania State University, an M.B.A. from the University of Pittsburgh, and a law degree degree from the Dickinson School of Law.

Now, does anybody think we’d be listening to this jackass if he stopped his college education at “My Mother’s Kitchen High School”  No. He went to a Catholic High School, then to a public college, got an MBA, and then went to Dickenson, which touts this:

 Law school is a time for embarking on a career and building friendships. An extensive assortment of student groups, along with student-sponsored activities and events, give students the opportunity to not only enhance their overall learning experience, but also to participate in the life of Penn State Law.

Hey, that sounds good, right?  Learn.  Make friends.  Widen your world view. 

This isn’t an “indoctrination mill” as Rick likes to call it.  It’s being exposed to people who aren’t exactly like yourself.  It’s easy to not like gays, or show disdain for “Blah” people when you live in a bubble and exist in a vat of vanilla ice cream.  

Yet this “mill” was good enough for him.  Then.  But for your kids, now - he wants them to have all the opportunity of one of the Duggars. 

Maybe Rick Santorum wants a world of undereducated Americans, people that can fix his cars and plumbing… maybe, worse, like Newt Gingrich, he wants an army of child labor to sweep the floors.

But the President isn’t saying everyone HAS to go to college, the President is saying everyone should have the opportunity to go.  Just like he did, just like Romney did, just like Santorum did and just like I did.  

That’s what this is about:  Santorum maintains Obama is a snob because Obama has the gall to believe every kid deserves to know their options, see their potential and then make an informed decision about what they want to do with their life.

But since “informed” is the last thing Santorum is counting on for votes, what other position - regardless of how hypocritical it is in the face of his education and degree - could he possibly take?

Holier Than Thou.  Electable-ier than… well, he’s really just flat out un-electable. 

COLUMBUS, Ohio — White House candidate Rick Santorum on Saturday questioned President Barack Obama’s Christian values and attacked GOP rival Mitt Romney’s Olympics leadership as he courted tea party activists and evangelical voters in Ohio, “ground zero” in the 2012 nomination fight.

Santorum, a former Pennsylvania senator known for his social conservative policies, said that Obama’s agenda is “not about you. It’s not about your quality of life. It’s not about your jobs. It’s about some phony ideal. Some phony theology. Not a theology based on the Bible. A different theology.”

Got that kids?  It’s some phony ideal.  A phony theology.  Not based on the bible.  

Let’s not even get into the whole “Church and State” thing, because Rick wants to be to America what the Ayotollah is in Iran.  

But are you listening other, saner, different Christians?  You can only be Christian if you’re Rick Santorum’s idea of a Christian.  And the rest of you should start making plans for your general admission seats in Hell.

That’s you, Lutherans.  Protestants.  Jews.  Mormons.  

In fact, that’s about 77% of America that aren’t “Catholic.”  

And as for you silly women with your silly body parts and your silly desire for contraception that’s not closing your slutty knees together using an aspirin, like they did back in the day you can pick out your hell chair as well.

So who could Santorum be speaking to that wouldn’t feel isolated? Catholic Men - a full 11.5% of the population.  Narrow bandwidth, sweater-vest.

This man will NEVER be president.  

This man will probably end up running a Chic-Fil-A and running it very poorly.  

The longer this moron stays in the race - the more the GOP talks about things like lady parts - the better it is for Obama.  So I’l all for it.  Keep bloodying each other.  Love it.

Still, today?   Santorum.  you can piss right off, you self-righteous strip of turd.  

______

11:29 update

Well, give a turd a chance and he’s still going to be a turd.  Here comes the spin.

A more congenial Rick Santorum doubled down on several controversial, and religiously laden, remarks in an interview Sunday morning on CBS’s “Face the Nation,” where he defended his recent claims that prenatal testing results in abortions, that federally provided education was “anachronistic,” and that President Obama’s policies are not “based on the Bible.”

“I’ve repeatedly said I don’t question the president’s faith,” Santorum told host Bob Schieffer, denying what some have said was a signal that Santorum had challenged the legitimacy of Obama’s Christianity. “I’ve repeatedly said that I believe the president’s Christian — he says he’s Christian. But I am talking about his worldview, the way he addresses problems in this country, and they’re different than most people view it in America.”

In a speech to Tea Party conservatives on Saturday in Columbus, Ohio, Santorum had dismissed Obama’s politics as being based in “some phony theology.”

An incredulous Bob Schieffer began his interview with Santorum Sunday by asking, “What in the world were you thinking?”

“I was talking about the radical environmentalists,” Santorum said, suggesting that they believe man should protect the earth, rather than “steward its resources.” “I think that is a phony ideal. I don’t believe that’s what we’re here to do … We’re not here to serve the earth. That is not the objective, man is the objective.”

Oh, shut the hell up you ridiculous throwback.  No you weren’t.  You were at a party with a bunch of similar minds and you pandered to the lowest common denominator.  Then you got called on it and you’re backpedalling.

“I was talking about radical environmentalists.”  Really?  Where in the above comments should we have figured that out?  Because you’re telling us now?  What a weird little liar you are.

Earlier in the day on Saturday, Santorum had also said that health insurance plans shouldn’t be required to cover prenatal testing, because that testing results in more abortions, as well as contending that government-run public education was “anachronistic.”

Sure!  And if a woman dies because of a complication, that’s okay, right?  Again, remember this when you vote, women:  To Rick Santorum, you are nothing but a tunnel to make more male babies.  Now get back in the kitchen.

Ass.

Is that the people behind this…

And this:

And this:

Don’t understand that women have power and worth something.  Even it’s something like this.

The